Monday, April 14, 2008

not a poem at all: the reason I'm super bummed

Today was scattered in so many directions. Need to go to Little Rock but have to accomplish a few things before leaving. Want a smoothie but get the wrong kind. Need to pick up an eyeglass prescription but the doctor isn't in (help yourself to the files when no one's looking). Get to the city too late to do the big things but too early not to do something. Try to do something and find out you've got the wrong prescription because it's the doctor's fault and he won't give you the right one until you come back in (capitalist bastard). Go get academic advising - somehow the teacher expects you to know what classes are required and says "okay and then what do you want to register for?" (mister can i please see some kind of list of options at least?) Then go one place and find out you're missing a form, go back to get the form and lose the giant bowl you were carrying cookies around in. Go to one office and find out you have to take a test first. Go to another and meet a fat bastard who won't listen to a word you say and thinks it's hillarious. Walk out while he's still in mid sentence. Go back to get the bowl: office is now closed. Leave to go get some good food so at least one thing this day goes right because you're surely done now and when you sit down to write, you can't find the FUCKING STACK of drafts you've been carrying around, tucked away safely, and editing bit by bit all week - the drafts from this month, the drafts from a show i'm working on with another couple of girls, one of whom also gave me a couple drafts i've also now lost... one of them was the poem for today which i'd hoped to have a lot more show and a lot less tell before posting... never mind the great edits scribbled all over them now lost... and the awkward naked shameful feeling that someone out there has got their grubby paws all over my naked skeleton drafts...

What is going on? This full moon is already tickling me in fourteen different directions, and I should have had at least three more days sanity before it kicked in. Wish me luck.

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